Physical (physiological) Distance
I thought moving 1000s of miles away
To 1000s of new people
Would make me forget
You
And I was embarrassed
When it wasn’t true
Someone asked me to write about coffee
So I’ll write about coffee
Coffee is like poetry
It’s an anecdote
It’s addictive
It makes my body tremble
It keeps me up all night
It turns me into a psychopath
It also makes me sane
It turns dust (life) into drink (living)
And sometimes I forget
That I ripped my heart out
And held it right in front of you
Let you judge it
Take what you wanted
Then refuse the rest
(the wounds of love unreturned)
Most times, I feel like the only person on the plant
Music stops
and I think it’s the end of the world
Silence
I took for granted
Every moment
Of thought provoking silence
Prodding
At the back corners
Of my mind
All brought to the surface in this place I call home that's love and hate and fear and my childhood and memories I forgot and remembered all at once now left to deal with them.
Pull at my chest
Unbutton the pain
Remind me I can feel
Remnants of vulnerability
One day you’ll wake and realize how real and unreal everything actually is. You go through life thinking you are invincible in more ways than one. Then you pop the tiny bubble you didn’t even realize you created for yourself, escape the tiny kingdom you wanted nothing to do with but actually ruled as queen. You’ll realize how small you are and how big the universe is. You’ll wonder if what you’ve been told is what you actually believe. You’ll attempt to blow a bubble similar in stature but it will always pop, and you’ll try to climb the ranks of a new kingdom but decide that maybe you’re an emotional democracy. You’ll dwell on the fact that it will never be the same and sometimes imagine that it is. It never will be. But it will be. Better.